New Book / It's Not Him/Her It's YOU!

According to this little tome, there are 15 huge mistakes men and women make which cause them to be single - either sitting on the shelf tapping your foot, or sabotaging the relationships they are in. The mistakes are as follows:

* Only being attracted to unavailable types
* Negative attitudes
* Being too bossy and picky
* Putting exercise before a relationship
* Being a workaholic
* A problem ex
* Toxic friendships
* Being hung up on a past lover
* Letting parents be too involved
* Neglecting yourself
* Casual, rather than committed sex
* Drama rules your life
* Being overly disorganised
* Being too clingy
* You can’t say no

I can see the point here, most definitely. And it is a little like the point that has been made about storytelling that there are only 7 storylines in the world, and that every story is simply a variation of these 7 storylines. But sometimes, it's not your fault or any fault of some persistent behaviour (eh.. disorganised is my middle name and I think it is somewhat adorable).

Sometimes you just meet a wolf in sheep's clothing. Or sometimes your instincts are wrong. Sometimes, John, it's not your fault! Go fuck yourself!

I'm all for self-improvement, and fixing things that are broken and being generous and compromising in a relationship. And I realise sometimes there's a fine line between compromise and being compromised, but suggesting that it's your fault all the time is a little rich. And newsflash - it's your imperfections that the right person might actually love. Sometimes your new love helps you iron out those imperfections. And sometimes, there just aren't any decent guys available! It happens!