Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The future's all yours, you lousy bicycles

RIP to one of those practically faultless people you grieve to see depart.

Over the weekend, Paul Newman - actor, husband of 50 years, philanthropist and general American icon - passed away at age 83. Over 5 decades in the film business, Newman made around 60 films - another vintage, busy actor. Newman was famous for his roles in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid and The Sting (both times starring with another of my favourite actors, Robert Redford - hello! babe-fest), Cat On A Hot Tin Roof alongside the inimitable Liz Taylor, and of course his Oscar-winning role in The Colour of Money. Despite possessing the movie star good looks that naturally lend themselves to the romantic lead, or your cliched hero, Newman continually sought out the role of anti-hero or loner - to dramatic, startling effect.

Newman will also be remembered for his extensive charity work - thankfully as we say goodbye to Paul Newman, we don't say goodbye to his charitable legacy. So erm... go and buy some salad dressing!

Another completely gratuitous shot. He was just divine.

I don't have a gift for anything. I've only had a gift of pursuit.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Thank God It's Friday

I'm in a good mood. I've got a new phone, new ring tone (yah Paul Simon!), it's Spring, I have plans for the weekend and it's Friday, baby!

Things to celebrate on a Friday:
  • Best mates, girlfriends, friends from afar, new friends - whatever. Every kind of friend! They're your partner in crime - they can cajole you into doing new things or going new places, you can encourage them to talk to that boy, wear those shoes, cut that hair, go for that job (even though I'll miss you when you're gone!), you can giggle the night away together or just have one of those mundane DVD + couch + peanut M&Ms nights and it doesn't matter. You can even "we must, we must, we must increase our bust" together. Friends - they're your life-blood, they're your chosen family. We loves them.
  • Mascara - big, black, twirly wands of eyelash-pumping goodness. Oooh flutter those eyes, lady - you are quarry sighted tonight!
  • Super-sexy, secret lingerie - stashed under your clothes, knowing no one will see it tonight or the next... But it's your little secret, it's what makes your eyes twinkle when your mind wanders.
  • Cheekbones - you know the kind, the sky-scrapers, the ones that graze the bottom of sunglasses, the ones dusted in blush, the little apples that form when you smile. Three cheers for cheekbones!
  • Gossip magazines... Know more about Posh in LA than you know about your neighbour. It's voyeurism at it's best (just don't pick on Britney!)
  • Sky high heels - the higher the better. Well-toned calves in a flash. Just remember - no one likes a foot shoved into a too-small shoe (esp the strappy kind - Christmas hams are to be scoffed not seen), and don't forget your pedi!
  • Sequins. I know not everyone agrees with that (those people clearly didn't spend every November drenched in sequins, waiting for their big moment on the stage at the annual dance concert). But it's the party season! Time to sparkle, dazzle and leave a sequin on their cheeks - your Cinderella calling-card.
  • Headbands - from Alannah Hill of course, drenched in feathers, buttons, sequins, ribbons, tulle you name it the Queen of Embellishment has it - in every colour.
  • Butterfly kisses and flirting - a romantic peck of the eyelashes, sensual making-eyes across the bar, giggles, hair twirls and glossy lips. What better way to wile away the moments until your next drink is served?

Happy, happy Friday!

Friday, September 19, 2008

Hello Boys!

I've got a couple of those Gossard Wonderbras. They are so brilliant, I swear, even I get cleavage with them.
- Kate Moss, 1994, New York Times Magazine

These days, it's the oldest trick in the book. Slip on a push-up bra; wear a skin-tight, low cut shirt, pull it down lower; a bit of lipgloss and a flutter of the eyelashes and everything will be yours - an extension to your assignment, a promotion at work (good luck with that one), sex, a discount at your local mechanic... Since its early incarnation from 2 handkerchiefs and some ribbon in 1913 - designed by New York girl about town Mary Phelps Jacob after discovering her run-of-the-mill corset just would not do with her lovely new sheer evening frock - the simple bra has fulfilled the desires of many a woman (and man, I suppose - although I wonder if their hopes aren't just a little bit dashed once the garment in question is removed?): they hide nipples, they give shape, they create cleavage where cleavage never was before - they can even hide cleavage. But don't be deceived by the apparent simplicity of these creations - the first wonder-bra, when its patent was registered in 1963, had 54 elements! Somehow, these 54 features did what no bra had ever done before - the chest became a smorgasboard, a talking point, the bigger the better, your hidden duck promising to lay a golden egg of opportunity.

And so the bra is redesigned, reshaped, re-angled every year - each promising more lift, shape and general cleavage enhancement than the next. It's exhausting. (But wonderful - I do love a good bra). But what do I love more than a good bra? A pretty array of lingerie. And who else better to deliver on this than the queen of burlesque and dancing-in-her-underwear herself, Dita Von Teese?

Dita Von Teese has just launched - in collaboration with WonderBra - her own range of vintage-inspired lingerie. The Teese range includes:
  • Multi-Teese: Described as a sexy multi-way set, handy for kinky bedroom antics and burlesque-style performances.
  • Spot-Teese: A saucy set decorated with casino chips.
  • Satin-Teese: The classic vintage look: glamour by the bucketload.

I have no idea if we'll get the range here in Oz - but it launches in the UK later this month. Lucky London ladies!

Dita's style rules
* Have items tailored to fit you. Most dry cleaners provide that service and it doesn't cost much. Everything I have has been taken in. If something fits you fantastically, it instantly looks designer.
* Don't punish yourself by putting on ugly lingerie just because it's for "everyday" wear.
* Go through your lingerie drawer and throw away anything with a blown elastic or underwires poking out. Have a little self-respect.
* Don't throw something away just because you haven't worn it in a year, like people tell you to do. I've rediscovered wonderful stuff that has been sitting around in my wardrobe for longer than that. (I love this piece of advice!)

Completely gratuitous shot of Kate Moss in Agent Provocateur. My favourite lingerie by far