Happy Friday: CRIPES! (Let's Go to New York)

Holy bejesus-bottoms it's December! I'm not sure where the year went, although I believe it flashed by while I lived in remote South Australia, up the duff and unable to really enjoy all the glory that South Australia has to offer (that would be wine). There were a bunch of trips to China in there but, like my current workplace, the location was not remotely glamorous and I was wearing safety clothing and steel capped boots rather than dancing the night away on sparkly, Shanghainese dance floors after eating my fill of dumplings. Admittedly, I have eaten a lot of dumplings this year, but I put that down to pregnancy. Let it be known that a pregnant woman can sniff out dumplings wherever she is.

This year's top Christmas gift award is taken out well and truly by Gilt (purveyor of beautifully curated, highly covetable, heavily discounted designer goods). For a paltry AU$4,500 you and a friend (i.e. me) could be winging your way to NYC to enjoy individualised 2 hour styling sessions at Gilt, a $1,000 Gilt gift card and (best of all) 2 tickets to the Kate Spade new York's Spring 2017 fashion party during New York Fashion Week on 8 February 2017.

There's a bunch of other stuff, including goodie bags, accommodation, tickets to MoMA and a Kate Spade gift bag, but frankly I shouldn't need to go into all that detail:

New York. Best friend. Shopping spree. Kate Spade.

New York, I love you

If they threw in "free babysitter", I'd be there 😉

Young vs Old

Handsome Hubby and I are celebrating 3 years of marriage today. Over the weekend, we attended a gorgeous wedding and one of the readings really tugged at my heart strings (MUCH easier to do post-baby it turns out).

Can there be anything more beautiful than young love? Is there anything more beautiful in life than a young couple clasping hands and pure hearts in the path to marriage? Can there be anything more beautiful than young love?

Yes, there is a more beautiful thing.

It is the spectacle of an old man and an old woman finishing their journey together on that path. Their hands may be gnarled, but still clasped; their faces wrinkled but still radiant; their hearts may be tired and slow as well as their brain, but still strong and wise with love and devotion to each other. Yes, there is a more beautiful thing than young love. Old love.

I think anything can spark that realisation. Initially I thought it was getting engaged (pfffffft! We were SO YOUNG then!). At the time I felt there was nothing that could more solidly indicate that grown up love than an engagement, and the realisation that a team has been formed: by choice, with love and with a mutual goal of commitment to a shared future. But it all became that bit more real when we had a kidlet together.  This little creature - a combination of bits of the both of us and our families - formed a whole lot more of the glue that binds us. While we definitely have our moments, looking into that shiny little face reminds me of the team we've built and how that team came together in the first place. We are in love. Happily so. We stare into our future with joy. And what a glorious feeling that is.

Happy Friday: Perspective

One fine, slightly windy day in August this year, I found myself in hospital in labor and very close to meeting a freshly minted baby girl. Fast forward approximately 11 weeks, and I'm sitting at my work laptop tapping out emails (and procrastinating via this blog), and waiting for the little squawk that signals wake up time for the divine Little Miss.

While I would prefer not to be at work so soon, I am lucky for now in that I get to work from home. While I have ventured into the concrete jungle of the city a number of times for meetings and half days in an office to test out how I'll go working away from Little Miss as well as juggling my laptop, work phone and a breast pump, I am doing the bulk of my work from home. In a few short weeks, I'll be back down south and back on site: donning PPE and full throttle back in to project life. A very large part of me is dreading the return to work.

I adore hanging out with my baby. I think I have totally scored (so far) in that she is calm much of the time, doles out the most gratifying of smiles, and sleeps through the night, meaning my tiredness is not as bad as I had expected. Breastfeeding has been a breeze, and during those hours spent feeding her not only is there the joy of moments spent entirely together as one happy unit, I have been churning through books and TV series with gusto. Those few weeks of not working actually felt like a rather pleasant little holiday (albeit housebound and with good heapings of domestic chores). But the weeks were numbered, and I have been back at work in some capacity for several weeks. This week has marked a fuller return to work, and in a few weeks once I'm back at site, I will be 110% there. As the project ramps up, I know the expectations of the workplace will be high (as it is for everyone in our team).

As I extremely tearfully waved goodbye to my mum this week after she helped me out with trialing me working back in the office, it all felt a bit much. Missing the lovely days spent together with Little Miss, and feeling the pressure of my job and the demands of a stressful workplace, I wondered what the hell I was doing. Just as I asked, the Universe delivered an answer.

Back in September, I wheeled Little Miss in her pram to a Brisbane Writers' Festival event featuring Kirstine Stewart. Kirstine Stewart - VP Media for Twitter and named one of Canadian Business's Power 50 of 2016 - had recently released Our Turn, a book that joins the ranks of Sheryl Sandberg's Lean In. A  passage that I read last night really resonated with me (thanks, Universe):

...along with the elusive "have-it-all" brass ring we've been primed to capture, the other concept that does a disservice to parents everywhere is the idea that you should strive for work-life balance. You may as well hunt unicorns. The very word "balance" suggests that somehow you can give equal importance and time to all corners of your life at the same time. The person who loses most in that equation is you; if exhaustion doesn't get to you, the guilt will.
The idea of balance doesn't reflect how the world works, or how we truly spend our time. It's not about achieving balance, it's about flow. We swing from one priority to the next, pushing hard at work and then pulling back to be with family. How hard you push and pull depends entirely on the moment. There are high-pressure times on the job when deadlines loom, trips need to be taken, or tough decisions have to be made, and you work flat out for a long stretch without making it home for dinner. But there are other times when a sick child or parent or spouse, say, or simply a much-needed vacation, takes precedence over any job. The key is to aim for a career in which you can earn the freedom to achieve work-life flow.

While the pursuit of freedom can sometimes be a trap in itself, I think we are now in an environment where many workplaces are more flexible than ever. As I work from home, I realise I needn't tie myself up in knots ensuring the green light of "available and working" is blinking on my Outlook profile at all times. As long as my work gets done, I should be taking this window of time and the enormous luxury I have of these remaining weeks of workplace freedom to spend  time with Little Miss. While dealing with perceptions once I'm back in the workplace will be another challenge in itself, it is not the challenge for this moment. For the next few weeks, I have earned the freedom to focus on Little Miss as well as still contributing to my Project team - so I might as well just enjoy it rather than fretting about something that is probably all just in my own head anyway.

Perspective is everything. What do you think of Kirstine's words?

You've Lost That Summer Feelin'

After a loooong week of meetings and playing email catch-up after my glorious week of basking in the sun in northern Queensland, I am looking at my forearms with a great deal of sadness: that summery glow seems to be disappearing faster than a heavily reduced Chanel handbag in a Hong Kong department store.

How to hold on to that summery glow?

Other than the very obvious spray tan (still terrifies me, although I tried out a St Tropez spray tan recently and it wasn't as Clockwork Orange as the early years of fake tans), there are still a number of products on the market that can keep you looking more outdoorsy than you actually are.

First up is St Tropez's new In-Shower Gradual Tan which generally attracts good reviews and - Fun Fact! - has been St Tropez' most successful tanning launch ever. I haven't tried this one myself (I am currently unable to reach past my knees on account of my big preggers belly) however my one reservation is that once you apply it in the shower you need to turn off the water and stand there for 3 minutes. That's fine - you can let your hair conditioner soak in at the same time - but you expect me to stand around for 3 minutes in the freezing cold dripping wet? On the plus side, this product isn't going to have you emerging from the shower stall looking like you've changed ethnic groups - the tan is low-key and of course a gradual build, so you can slow that down by applying the product less if need be.

Kate Somerville Tanning Towelettes. A little like the towelettes you get at KFC and Red Rooster when you dive in to foods cooked to reduce your life expectancy, this self-tanner is wiped all over the body after showering, is sealed in with an application of your favourite moisturiser and, following a good night's sleep, you'll wake with a glow. Use these guys once per week.

Sun 365 Self-Tanning Concentrate allows you to turn any facial or body moisturiser into a self-tanner, with the added bonus of enabling you to control how much colour you get by adjusting the amount you mix per use. Personally, I prefer to let the professionals create the formulation, but I really like the idea of this - and also the joy of choosing the fragrance of your self-tan yourself. So many self-tanning products are stinky in their own unique way - whether it be too chemical smelling, or too much floral overcompensation. Added bonus: it's much cheaper than a lot of products on the market.

Then of course there is the stable of celebrity-created tanning products: the JBronze range, created by perma-tanned, ultimate beach babe Jennifer Hawkins...

 and Lara Bingle-Worthington's range, The Base which is - depending on how you like to shop - only available online. Without having tried it myself, I have read that the Instant Tanning Mousse magically smells like doughnuts, is uber-easy to apply and yields a warm golden glow. So on a number of fronts, this product sounds like a winner. There is also a Body Glow Oil in the range which dries non-greasy, doesn't stain your clothes and again reportedly smells like a doughnut.

And to finish, some DIY tanning tips from Lara:

DO's

DO exfoliate 24 hours before tanning, use an exfoliator that contains a AHA.

DO rub half a lemon on the area that streaks or splotches appear for two minutes before lightly buffing it with a damp towel.

DO use a tanning mitt when using your self tan.

DO mostiurse the dry areas on your body before tanning, i.e Hands, feet, knees, ankles and any dry areas.

DO make sure your self tan is clear on the skin by rubbing a wet wipe over the skin first. If you want to go darker, apply a second layer an hour later, DON'T apply on the next day.

DO pick a self tanning product that suits your skin tone.

DO use a cold compress on your face before tanning to minimise your pores.

DO build up fine layers when it comes to the face.

DO start from your ankles and work your way up to your shoulders, saving your arms and hands for last.

DO moisturise daily so your tan lasts longer.

DO apply vaseline on your eye brows before tanning your face.

DO exfoliate after 4 days to help your tan fade evenly.

DON'Ts

DON'T shave the day after tanning, if you have to, use an electric shaver as this will not remove your tan.

DON'T use a tan that does not suit your skintone, you want it to pop your complexion with colour, not overpower it.

DON'T over-rub your self-tan when applying.

DON'T apply product directly onto hands and feet, work the excess product from the arms onto the hands and the excess tan from the legs onto the feet area.

DON'T wash your hands for at least 8 hours after tanning, otherwise you will get the white hands brown arms look.

DON'T clean your teeth after applying your self tan, do it before, this will stop it looking white around this area.

DON'T exercise for 24 hours after tanning.

DON'T use oils on the skin after tanning, this will strip your self tan and make it look uneven.

DON'T apply more than once every two days when using a gradual tan, otherwise your tan will look unnatural.

Happy (safe) tanning ladies!

Black Out Curtains

With the relentless march towards sleeplessness coming closer to its final destination, I have decided I probably need some kick-arse Anna Wintour style sunglasses to hide the bags under my eyes from the friendly people in my neighbourhood.

Living in a city like Brisbane makes it hard to go anywhere without bumping into people you know. This is a lovely thing, but some days (i.e. the days when you haven't brushed teeth or hair) it's the last thing you want. I also find that the day you're in your least flattering jeans and haven't a scrap of make-up on your face (oh the humiliation of not being in either adorable boots or fabulous heels and sans mascara to add to the horror!) is the day you are guaranteed to see an ex-boyfriend or a frenemy and all you want is to look a bit glamorous and just a touch more put together than that familiar person in your line of sight. Never happens though, ammiright?

I recently came across Thierry Lasry sunglasses while floating around Sydney: described as sunglasses based on the concept of futuristic vintage with an updated, modern and avant garde touch, I think these are pretty much exactly what's needed to evade the Fashion Police over the next few months.

While there's not a whole lot new that can be done with sunglasses, it's nice to have a newer player in the game apart from the usual Gucci, Prada, Tom Ford, D&G. At this stage, I've only seen Thierry Lasry stocked in Brisbane at Scanlan Theodore and boutique opticians.

Happy Friday: Summer Holiday

Holy wow it is finally here - one whole week of holidays. In the SUN. In temperatures exceeding the mid-teens. And I don't have to do anything other than "take it easy" and "eat what I like" and "spoil yourself". All hail the pregnancy card!

My main priorities next week are to: have pedicure; enjoy oily in-room massage; read latest Vogue; read trashy novel; eat delightful breakfasts with sides of croissant; generate slightly olive glow on skin; engage in afternoon napping.

 

While it would be great to do all of this with a flat stomach, I guess you can't have everything. At least I get to do it all with my handsome hubby taking care of me in his signature gentlemanly style.

 

Shoesday: Feeling Flat

"Oh my god! You really are pregnant - you're wearing flats!!" my friend exclaimed: partly in horror, partly amused and partly in sympathy: there's no way I'd be giving up my beloved heels without a solid fight (and very firm advice from a medical professional, and even then I tend to ignore such advice. Frankly, I gave up the heels because I was scared).

I can narrow it down to the exact moment when I believe my attempts at super-human activity as a pregnant woman lead to the downfall of my pelvis, and marked the end of wearing high heels for the next few months.

Since the beginning of June I have been moving at the pace of a crippled snail thanks to a condition that affects about 2% of pregnant women: pubic symphysis disfunction (PSD). Essentially, the ligaments that normally keep your pelvic bone aligned during pregnancy become too relaxed too soon before birth (it's meant to happen closer to birth - I've had symptoms since the start of June. With a due date at the later part of August this is waaaay too early) . As a result, the pelvic joint (aka the symphysis pubis) becomes unstable and can cause pelvic pain, the most common symptom being difficulty walking and wrenching pain - as though your very being is tearing apart.

Thankfully, the weekend this happened an Occupational Therapist friend of mine was in town, and she quickly told me the symptoms were not normal, that she had heard of it happening, and the best thing to do was to get some help from a physio. I had wrongly assumed this was a normal - horrible - part of pregnancy and that I would just have to slug through it. Admittedly, I am just slugging through it, but I have been getting some assistance from a physio and massage therapist and it has helped somewhat. To be perfectly honest though, the pain is still pretty intense and there are days where I spend most of my afternoon or evening in tears because it is so painful and so frustrating. I am frustrated in the sense that I can't walk without pain, and for a person who extols the virtues of tuck jumps, not being able to move freely is an awful impediment to living what I consider a normal, healthy life.

So there it is: pregnancy since the start of June has been hell on earth, and some days, it is a struggle to remain upbeat. My pity parties can be quite intense (I'm sure exacerbated by pregnant lady hormones). Not even a new visual album from Beyonce is enough to cheer me up some days.

Beyonce: feeling the feels.

For those of you who are pregnant or are planning on getting pregnant, fear not: this isn't a common side effect of pregnancy. My only advice is that if you are feeling any type of pain during pregnancy, do NOT stoically soldier on and go and get some professional help. You may continue to damage yourself or make worse your new condition. For example, don't go to a gym class thinking a nice bit of exercise will tease out the muscular pain you are suddenly and intensely feeling (#iamanidiot).

In case you don't believe me, there are women out there still doing these types of activities at 40 weeks pregnant:

Photo courtesy of YogawithGeorgia 

Shots like that actually make me want to cry tears of frustration, as I know pregnancy is not meant to be 100% nightmare. I am feeling unfairly targeted by the Universe and wondering what I did so wrong for this to happen. Also distressing for me is that the only cure for my malaise is child birth, which seems like such an abstract - and frankly not very reassuring - cure, that I remain fearful that I will never be fixed and this is permanent. No more tuck jumps - ever. *cry*

Enough of my sooking. Next week, hubby and I are off to Palm Cove for a long awaited Babymoon. I can't wait! I am so, so tired (the PSD means rolling over in bed is wretchedly painful, so my sleep is frequently punctuated with trips to the loo and painful attempts at rolling over, plus my workplace commences every day at 7:30am sharp with a site meeting). Having been in a winter climate since March, I am also looking forward to tropical weather, tropical fruits and open toed shoes!

FLAT ONES OF COURSE.

Metallic, bejewelled or adorned with pom-poms, I really don't care. As long as they're pretty and come with a pedicure, I'll be happy.